Tuesday, March 01, 2011

FUCKING ZACK




I fucking hate other people named Zack. why the fuck do they have to have my name, get your own fucking name, like bob or dick wad. why steal steal mine. it is only quite recently that there has been this seeming surge of "zacks" everywhere... when i was growing up i knew of only one other. we hung for a few weeks but he didn't live up to the name. he got kicked to the curb and literally moved out of town...
there was one on t.v. who was a fucking retard and was the "class clown" whose best buddy was screech.. who the hell has a buddy named screech in high school?! now these imposters are popping up all over the place, in movies, t.v. shows, even here in my own town! get the fuck out scum suckers, quit ruining my name.
you play in a lame band? Zacks don't play in a lame ass bands, playing wamby pamby poor me i need a fucking girlfriend music... Zack turns a wrench on bulldozers and heavy equipment for a living, shoot guns and ride dirt bikes...
your mommy and daddy bought you a new car and you don't like the color? zacks don't have people buying them cars, in fact zack BUILDS shit from the ground up, mobs them and builds them again!!
you make movies with your silly ass beard and run around like a fucking moron! zacks don't make movies and run around like a moron...err... wait, i have done that, but I'm not trying to act like fucking idiot, i was an idiot... wait that's not coming out right either..
seriously though, wtf, why do these "zacks" have to be out there fucking up my name, when i meet them, one of the first things i ask is have they ever met any Zacks that they like and their answer is usually "no"... that generally sets the tone for the rest of our conversation... nothing like a little "hey, i don't fucking like you just because, so suck it and go fuck yourself before i find some monkey to do it for you..."
do you all have these issues as well? i mean is their this huge thing when you meet people who share your name and that naturally you think they suck? it just doesn't happen to me all that often so i don't know...

16 comments:

Unknown said...

Hahaaaa! Yeah it happens to me and for sure I'm gonna be against you from the start if your name is "Leah" and especially if you don't live up to it!! lOL!

kylie said...

i've never met a kylie as good as me

so good to see you post, zack

Megan said...

Yes.

INNER VOICES said...

leah! no doubt, looks like im not the only one...

kylie, i never really thought it happens to anybody else...

megan, and how..

kylie said...

zack, yo u know theres gonna be a bloggers party in LA in may? suzanne is planning for you to be there :)

Anonymous said...

i've been such a poor blogger as of late, i'll have to step up my game to be able to call myself a blogger once again... good info though kylie, what the score? is it a blogspot event or private party?

zack

kylie said...

it's a party for the clientele of the wild onion, remember that?
there are no details yet but it's the topic of the moment on facebook

Megan said...

Zack, you and Cheese should come down if you can. Or just give Kylie the directions to your place so she can hit it on her way upstate.

First weekend in June is looking like the plan. I know, end of the school year. See what you can do? You still have my email?

kylie said...

sorry bout the end of school year thing, next time i'll do it all better

levi said...

ya...

try having another levi around.

ya, 2 levi's within 10 miles of each other. wtf is that? i'm not even jewish.

Megan said...

Srsly dude shoot me an email? Even to say you can't possibly / don't want to / your house fell off the cliff last month?

xxoo

INNER VOICES said...

june eh? people of the onion? sounds like it could be fun, i'm one of those last minute shower uppers,unless there are things i need to rsvp for... strippers, shots at hooters, tattoos, shots at hooters with strippers getting tattoos.. that sort of thing...

kylie said...

yeah, first weekend of june. talk to megan

ihateeverything said...

ooooh i don't like skylers.

whoever's name is skyler is most likely a TOOL.

Anonymous said...

Message received. - M

Violet said...

well zack, i hear ya!
i am violet.
as in that's what my driver's license and social security card say, and who my paychecks are made out to.
i'm not some tiffany who calls herself violet, or an amy who tells people she is violette- and has the audacity to say it with a french accent.
these posers must pay for their crimes-
being boring while claiming a passive sense of being interesting.
the punishment:
a punch in the mouth, and a tattoo on the neck that says "call me blase' "
grrrrrrr