Friday, February 29, 2008


a bright future is born

SO I STOLE THIS PIC FROM ONE OF MJ FRIENDS AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUCKING GREAT!! THANK YOU TATAS FOR THE WONDERFUL PICTURE. arrrggh caps lock was on.. well I'm not writing that all over again. so just imagine I'm yelling at you for a moment there... so getting ready to leave and drink beer, i mean drive home. we are having a sleep over tonight and should be fun! perhaps we can have the neighbors over and have more kids...
this will sound weird to folks with no kids and up until a year ago i would have called you a lunatic, but the more kids you have over the less work it is watching them. they band together like little people and boss each other around and give each other jobs.. they are always trying to outdo each other and impress one another and the like... only two home? bored out of their fucking minds... five kids over and you hardly see them, poof gone! they come in and out when they need a snack/drink/phone call/whatever... other then that they take care of them selves. unless there is some real wuss kid that needs some more mommy time... or has issues... whatever the case may be, i find its less stressful to have sleepovers most times...
have a great weekend all!

not for soft eyes...

everyone around here is already talking about Easter... did we not just have a holiday with chocolate and money wasting? sick of it already... they opened up this Costco size bag of candy in here with Easter candy!!! WTF? no one is talking about the leap year! this day happens once every what four years! why don't we open up a Costco size bag of beer and get drunk! why the fuck do we celebrate a religious holiday by moving it around the calender every year and eat more shit chocolate? "its for the kids..." fuck you! every day of the year is for the kids, our lives revolve around finding things to keep children stimulated... what does Easter have to do with any of it...

now don't get me wrong.

we had an awesome time last Easter... this year should be fun as well! but that was ON EASTER. not three weeks before. anyway, now they are yelling something about work. i yelled back some about wheres the fucking beer... better go see what the commotion is... cheers y'all!

Thursday, February 28, 2008

those were the days....

so hntr has posted a quick memory of us as kids and how we may have met here... funny, i remember it too! back to the grind!
I need a day off too...
not much time this moment... i have been working my ass off all morning!!! have a great afternoon! i'll be back.... thank you all for the zillions of comments and deletes ive recieved!!! i'll be adressing that soon, until then here is 5000 thousand naked people!

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

i said no to the urinal, how about a vagina couch!!!

this is just for cher. as seen here! i didn't want bbc to be perving out here again so i can't post the vagina urinal.... hope this works for you!

what to do about it?

this pic has been here too, but now it has me thinking.

so, perusing my picture archives on this here computer, i found this one. yeah its me. i got it when my mother committed suicide. on my way back from the memorial i stopped in Portland Oregon and stayed with a friend. we went out to tiger lily tattoo (that's the best i can do for a link) to get this done. the woman who did it was great. i went there because when i called around to see who was interested in doing the work, she was ecstatic about the reasoning behind it and said she loved doing letters.

it didn't take long and was the least painful of all the tattoos i have. but it brings me to the next potion of the story...

several years ago i started a back piece that i have not had any work done on in years. massive wings and angel running down the center of my back... this one was painful on and off. i fell asleep often during the wings and on the two occasions i went black and blue tattoo i had the same artist do the work. once she wore a complete cheer leaders uniform while working. funny lady, her name was cedar...

the angel i had done at pleasure point tattoo, sorry no links for them seem to exist. anyways... i wasn't real happy with how the final work was looking on the wings. but its there and that is how its gonna be. but i need to get it finished. its been on my mind. i also need to have some touch up work done above my back piece where it has my grandfathers last name across my shoulders. i never see it is part of the problem. impossible to miss for everyone else, but rarely visible to me... (if your lucky I'll get a pic and post it. i keep threatening to do that, wah for you.)
so in the coming weeks I'll be saving a few bucks for it... I'll be bitching about that later is what that means... and shopping for a new artist. lunch time is nearing an end.. i better get to work...
edit: twenty points for who can tell me where the quote on my arm came from.

in the office

I've posted this picture before, but i like it and i didn't want Cher to be the only one who sees dead people...

after a couple of years of reading blogs and discovering what i like and who and where I'll comment to, there seems to be one common thing about them all. anon assholes. people who pop in and blast out words like slut or bitch. try and leave nasty messages about peoples work and writings.. SSA writes about it this week and fessing up has a comment box full of the shit on her most recent post. what is with that.
i understand that there are web sites dedicated to analysing blogs and writing critiques about them. there are sites like digg it where people will rant about stuff and post links. this is where a lot of the trash heads who enter the blogging world come from. people who don't have many original thoughts of there own or the confidence to write down their thoughts on "paper".
to post something mean anonymously in a blog comment box is childish. (not you denim, you just don't want to come out of the closet yet. i understand.) how much backbone does it take to call someone an asshole or a cunt from the security of your dark little corner in your room at yer grandmas house...
some people delete these comments, some turn on filters to discourage these imbeciles and others engage them. i dunno. i have had some hate mail here in the past. (a long time ago) and wouldn't really care to have any again... why i wrote this down this morning i dunno... but that was this mornings thought. happy wednesday.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

new reader exploitation

welcomes to recycled cha0s! I've been lurking at her blog for a bit of time and now she has been to the voices!!! this picture was from her site and the other blog she keeps is for her photography! and a website! check her out! shes wicked...

last night


so after getting off work last night i went to town to meet up with cheese and denim for a few drinks at the Rio grill. our buddy was working and we scored a couple of drinks. talked about the day and weird Internet chic for a couple of hours... had some to go shots of Yeager and went next door to Safeway for grocery shopping!

drunken grocery shopping is the bomb! i grabbed some items to throw in the top shelf of the cart and grabbed my self some malt liquor/energy drinks and popped one open. it took us about an hour and a half to make our way through the store. sneaking sips on the beer along the way. its a brand new store and has everything you could need except for packaged pig faces as seen here in nations post of her grocery store.

anyway, after wandering around and gathering up our goods, we checked out in the fifteen items or less aisle. three hundred and forty dollars later, the checker asks the bagger if she smells Bacardi. as she rings through the empty sparks beverage. we all laugh and finally make our way to the parking lot.

get home and crack open a few more cold ones and cheese reads to me the warm comments from you all and i decide i want to call Kay! I'm so glad we did!

she is fucking awesome! beyond awesome.... fucking cool. I've never called a friend I've met online before and have been nervous ever since she gave me her number saying i should give her a buzz. felt guilty with all the non stop port jokes i left on her machine when i had called the first time(she was on the other line when i had called minutes before, can you believe the nerve?!?! and talking to her mom, no less.) and we chatted away for a while, passed the phone over to cheese and they chatted too! (nice going on the words of wisdom at the end babe... hopefully Kay wont be kicking your ass when we meet up for that one...)

i couldn't hardly go to sleep and we talked about the phone call until we passed out. Kay fucking rocks and we will be drinking some cold ones soon. I'm still buzzing from our conversation last night... big smile on my face...

moral of the story, life is only as much as fun as you make it... oh and picture credit goes here.



Monday, February 25, 2008

for those of you with a different taste

rock on

you didn't hear it from me, but you do have to read this guy... if you like food, wine, travel, politics and occasional stories about random locals, this guy is your man. i wont pimp him too much, but go there if you like food and wine. he is a chef and travel connoisseur. Spain is his favorite place and its generally a safe site to peruse. his last post is more than just fun to read... and if you do comment, you didn't get there from here. the voices gets no credit.. heh heh.

edited version of earlier post

I'm gonna round up my posse for a witch hunt

cheese and i went to bed last night with some heavy heads... we are working out this issue that has something to do with her children's potential safety. I'm not sure what i can comfortably talk about, but its really bothering the fucking hell out of me.

its also brought out some odd feelings for me. these aren't my kids, but guess what... when they are around me and we are out, don't be looking sideways at my kids! don't be fucking weirding out around them, near them, whatever... I'll take you the fuck down and have you laying face down in a deep hole before your pants hit yer ankles. don't be some freaky pedo around me. that goes for when I'm not around too. remember these words... FACE DOWN, DEEP HOLE, NO MORE OXYGEN FOR YOU...

now I'm not some over protective dude either..." jump on yer dirt bike! beat it! why don't you hike down to the creek? go to the neighbors house if your bored." (i got over-ruled on that one.) "why don't you build a tree house or something, you know where the power tools are! take the dogs on a walk."

whatever... but whats with people making me feel all protective, enough so that its pissing me off. I'm losing sleep on this shit.... perhaps I'll get the clear from the cheese and can talk about it some more... my bad, really vague, sorry. just needing to vent a little bit this morning... U.P.S. just showed up with my parts and i need to get this anger out on the volumetric batch plants auger hydraulic drive assembly.

edit: i got the go ahead from cheese... here it is!
tell me what you all think of this scenario. months back, cheeses ex, dated a woman for a short while. on the eve of cheeses mother /daughter day in town, the "new girlfriend" takes her to town on a shopping, nails done, see a movie type afternoon. (completely unheard of. i was not permitted to hang solo with the girls for almost a year. until everyone was comfortable. little cheese going to town with dads girlfriend was not a comfortable situation for any of us. why it happened we will never know.)
a short time later the girls dad and his new girlfriend were no more. relationship had run its course and was done. you would think that would be the end of it no? no....
they have been corresponding via email and e-cards since then. weird? recently we have been hearing more and more about this woman. from little cheese and from reading little notes left laying around the house/backpack/pockets/laundry/etc... "my new best friend, i miss her so much, when will i see her again, also etc..."
we had about enough of this last night and did the unspeakable... yep, we cracked the journal open(which was laying open on the couch from the days entry.) gist of it is, she writes how sad and depressed she is about not being able to see her "best friend". how they plan on "meeting up" this Sunday in town for a days activities... with her young son (who she somehow lost custody of. not judging that here, shit happens i know, but its also something to think about.) we tried to access her emails and the like but to no avail.
a phone call to her father revealed that he has not had contact with the woman in quite some time and that their relationship was indeed a brief one. he had also been hearing about this from his young one and was as ready as we were to put and end to this oddity of a friendship.
here is how i see it, i will only speak for my self. what the fuck is a full grown woman doing carrying on a friendship with a nine year old girl? an Internet relationship.
here is what cheese and i both agree on. if these roles were reversed and little cheese was communicating with a man cheese had been involved with for a short stint, the rules would already be in place and the man dealt with promptly.
they have decided that this friendship ends today and little cheese will need to be forth coming with all of the information and details. if it continues on for one more minute past her parents comfort zone i will be politely knocking on her door. i almost want to meet the woman, i could suss her out in a minute and I'm sure she would "understand" very rapidly...
so if yer still reading and care to give me your two cents, id appreciate it!

nations dropped this picture

check out those gams eh?

so i think nations dropped this picture out of her purse., after she ran out of my comment box the other day. she had a great post of some family activities (complete friction) but its a fun post. happy Monday all, need to get some work done this morning... so I'll just pimp out a fellow bloggers work instead. I'll be back though, just fair warning to you....

Friday, February 22, 2008


its almost one in the afternoon and im outa here! you kids all party hard this weekend and make me proud! i'll check back in with yall on the macdialup this weekend but untill then i'll see you all in moderation!!!

not a dirty animal thingy

"just because you are not paranoid, doesn't mean they are not watching"

so we have two male dogs at home, that spend anywhere from eight to ten hours a day hanging out with only each other. they are gay and that's fine with me, its not like they really have a choice. kind of a last two dogs on the planet type thing. they wrestle and play like any other dog would do. they sleep in the same dog bed most of the time(even though we have two).

when beau impaled himself last month, charlie was licking the bloody wound and vice versa. it wasn't until last month that we noticed our boys had decided to take it to the next level. when right in the middle of a movie and in front of the t.v. they started their little show!

"WTF? dogs outta here! what the hell is that? did you see that? what where they doing?"

like we didn't know, and so now and again when they put on this little act/show for us and we boot them out side to finish their, um business.

i guess if i were to have my nuts chopped off and be locked in the house all day with my buddy and didn't really have any other human contact.....

a little something for BBC, fucking pervert.

another rainy day, another day of directing helpers to jobs and the like. another day of sitting in my office waiting the end of the shift. waiting for the ups driver to bring me parts. aaahh, the life... while everyone else is putting rain gear on and wiping off backhoe seats, i stand and watch from the "shipping room" with yet another cup of construction office style coffee.

the weekend is coming up and we have another wind storm moving in. we need some netflix to arrive so i don't have to watch fly away home or Mary Poppins again. yeah poor me eh? a nice weekend off. sitting by the fire and relaxing. playing scrabble and sleeping in late. i have a feeling I'll be leaving early today. real early...

people are talking generators and tarps, getting sand and gravel for roads and driveways. hunkering down for the large storm . suppose I'll bring home some gravel and hit up some of caverns in our driveway. the quad needs to be tarped and the chickens will need to be squished into their coop. ahhh, all the plants we put in will get a nice soaking and hopefully with all this rain they wont get a frost. this years garden will be three times the size as last years...

this is turning out to be a lame post, putting people to sleep i bet. so no need to wake up folks, now that i have lulled you all into a dreamy bliss... sweet morning...

hey! speel check is werking again!!!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

see if anyone notices

so i started a best of box over on the right. its just the same shit you have all read before. if you find yourself wanting me to add to or remove any of those ive posted there, lemme know. im sure ive left some good ones out that need to be put on the list!!!


did she say "bombing for a piece of fuckung viginity"

here is a post i wrote years ago.
i don't know if its relevant or not, but it was how i was feeling about property owners in big sur.
then here is how i felt weeks later when i was writing about the house I'm in now....
and how i felt when i got it!
but i think what i was trying to get at with that is why people and their properties are so funny.
superuberichfuckingasshole property owners will neglect and not care for their million dollar homes and land. and when they do come here it is like camping out in the redwoods to them... oooh, no t.v., no high speed internet and depending how long its been since they were last here, no phone. these are the worst of the land owners here. they refer to locals as you people, as in "what do you people do around here?" "you people must be crazy to live way out here."we live twenty six miles from town. this is not the sahara.
superuberrichfuckingcool property owners are another breed. they are the ones who hire people to live/work on their land. they have ample caretakers houses on site and may never come to the property but twice a year. they pay for upkeep, maintenance of vehicles and equipment, etc... they refer to you as friend or my caretakers, as in "my caretakers are doing such a good job on the property."
then we have the superubercheapfuckingbastard property owning types. they generally live somewhere on the land with the only view and decent road. they might have several "rental units" on site where they "help out the locals" by providing much need housing. trailers, converted chicken coops, steel containers, old water barrels, etc.. they refer to people as tenants or renters, as in "my tenants are late with the fucking rent again, i think i'll turn off their gas."
the waytoostonedandstuckinmyownlife land owners are also found around here. they are the ones who expect their "tenants and renters" to do all the work around the property. because it is such a privilege to live there. they will come up with cool names for these chores and have every one meet on a specific day or "ranch day". to make things more efficient. they might say things like "hey you, why don't you move your truck!" or "why don't you stop by later and help me move some wood."
then you have the staythefuckoffmyproperty types, they don't want anyone around looking over their fences or hopping their gates... they don't own that much and want to keep their little Shangri-La private. "you might catch wind of them saying "stay the fuck off my road!" or "those are my bushes your pissing on, pick up you fucking beer cans and get the fuck off my lawn!" they refer to people as asshole or fucking drunks...
and then we get to the idonthaveanymoneybutmypropertyisworthamilliondollars types. these are the folks who drive around in their 86 cherokees and parade around like they have millions. they talk like it too. "i just put my house on the market for two point six. it should sell quick at that price... would you pass the fried pickles?" these folks have been smoking too much of their neighbors shit and need to take a look at themselves in someone else's mirror. you might hear these people referring to other folks as stiffs or the working class. but they are no better.
there are obviously a lot of different folks, these are the ones i had time to talk about before i leave work early and go home to baby sit the thirty pack that cheese brought home last night! nothing impresses the girlfriends mother more than the drunk, fat, lazy boyfriend passed out on the couch in a puddle of pee... enjoy the afternoon kids!

um, yeah... hell yeah!!


I have a hard believing that anything good comes out of utah, but here is what i was talking about. um, go utah?

its not friday?

my bus never stopped here, perhaps i would have been more interested in school?!?

after leaving work a little early yesterday, i made my way home and enjoyed the view along the coast. got home and realized i hadn't had my normal road soda, so i popped open a beer and started to set up for some wood splitting.
"damn, i sucked all the gas out of the wood splitter for cheeses daughters mini-bike. there goes that idea."
settled into some gardening and tubed up some seeds that i had been germinating. got the fire started and cracked open another beer. cheese rolled up, unloaded some groceries and plants that she picked up at the nursery in town. moved plants around in our greenhouse to accommodate the new arrivals and checked on the chickens. 16 eggs, uggh.
we have so many eggs and no crates for them... whatever. farted around in the yard some more and saw our neighbor come home. arranged for her to come down for drinks when she got settled in. stoked the fire and listened to our phone messages. cheeses mom is going to come up this evening and spend the night with us, then take care of the girls tomorrow while we are at school/work. sweet! better remember to pick up some wine. fuck if i can remember if she likes red or white.
i have a nice selection of both at home, but when these ladies get into their second and third bottle, i don't think they notice if its a forty dollar bottle or fourteen dollar bottle. i'll pick up acouple bottles of pinot gri and some merlot just in case.
neighbor rolls in and we chat about how her boyfriend just got the contract with the sheriffs department to fly around and look for marijuana growers. (those pesky dopers, eh?) settle in with a few mixed cocktails. cheese busted out a concoction of pineapple/orange vodkas with a hint of roses lime juice on the rocks. i stuck with the coors light. we went back and forth about how things were going and how she would like to live in town next to the coast or out in carmel valley somewhere. her property in mexico is having troubles with "those damn jews next door". funny how things pop up like that. never would have pegged her for such a racialy aware type person. huh.
i finally ask her about the property...
"so, what are you thinking about asking for land?"
"well, i talked with hillary about listing it and what he thought it might be worth... i was going to ask for seven fifty, and take seven. depending on the terms."
somewhere in there i snorkeled half my beer up into my nose and snorted it back down so i didn't blow it all over the coffee table.
"wow! well... that's more than i thought." my face must have looked hysterical!
"the property has a plumbed water system and foundations for a house. i'm just tired of camping and my boyfriend likes his creature comforts.... blah, blah, blah.."
we chat some more about the land, our other neighbors, dogs and our road. we discussed how she would have to carry the loan(due to the fact that it is only land, all the buildings and roads on it are illegal. the banks would never loan three quarters of a million dollars for unimproved land right now.) and how she'd expect at least a hundred thousand for a down. she looks at me and says....
"doesn't your dad have money? perhaps..." she trails off when i shake my head and offer her no way to continue. (hey dad! got a hundred thousand or so laying around? ahahahahahaaa!) and cheeses family is land rich, money poor as they say here in the Sur. so we finish up our drinks and go out side to watch the fog cover up the last full lunar eclipse until 2010. and then i throw out the last whack....
"so let us know if you change your mind and want to come down to about a third of your asking price, we could maybe scratch up ten percent of that for the down and afford about fifteen hundred a month with four percent."
she laughs. i laugh... knowing full well why she thinks her land is so valuable... cheese and i return to the warmth of our house and talk about what just went down and i make us some breakfast quesadillas for dinner.(we have a lot of eggs, remember?)

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

if nothing else

if nothing else... yeah, im not feeling the posting vibe as of this moment. the sun is out and i need a red bull. so at least i found a fun picture to get your brains working. have a nice day!

later on that day...

so im leaving work early today, going home to split some wood, load it into my truck, move it like forty feet and unload it into my wood shed, very exciting... just drank my red bull and that should kick in soon. see ya later!

is this the pig?

this might be what nations and pink are looking for. no? well i tried...

Tuesday, February 19, 2008


"she hit a vein"

thats some funny ass shit. i dont want to beat a dead horse here, but over in comment land in the post underneath this one, there was an ever so one sided brief disscusion on the compatibility of the two colors red and black. any body else have some input? thoughts. suzanne says hell no. i say fuck yah! and denims response might go something like this WTF LADY? i tend not to be so offensive, i understand we all have different tastes. so give me your thoughts on the colors.
thank you denim for the constructivism pics!
1986 honda 250r xl

YEAH!!! GOT MY FUCKING DIRT BIKE!!!! FREE! WITH TITLE AND PINK SLIP!!!! I DIDNT STEAL THIS ONE... (not that i have ever done that before or would. heh.) sweet. it doesnt run, yet. but i have all the parts and the guy i got it from said it ran when he parked it two years ago... it only has eleven hundred miles on it! wicked. ive been driving around with it in the back of my truck like an asshole advertising that i should be ripped off. what a jerk eh? fuck it though.

the motorcycle store said that they would give me a $1000 for a trade in on a new one. i'm thinking about it. but man would the guy who gave me this bike be pissed when i roll up on a new kawasaki! w
blogger can suck my ass right now! they are having difficulties and erased the rest of this entry... cocks...

not really a post

i need one of these.

Monday, February 18, 2008


talked with the potential property seller this morning. she will be back in town on wednesday. evening.

"so i'll bring up some tequilla and get you good and drunk..."

"hahaha, maybe i'll just give you the property then!"


*shoulders up, head down, eyes slanted, rubbing hands together, complete with eveil grin*

"good, we will see you wednesday evening..."

one thing i've learned in life is not to get my hopes up. when i want something really bad and stress about it, it never happens. if i dont care and leave things up to themselves, good things happen to me. thats not to say i dont work for the things i have in my life, but i dont get my feathers all fluffed up either... (that would be a chicken reference. spent a lot of time hanging out watching them on sunday.)

so the way i feel about this potential deal is whatever. i dont really give a shit. it seems like it would be a massive headache. stress. which has taken me years to let go of. it affects me horribly.

well, good day to you at this point i dont have much to bitch about....

oh those boys outside cleaning trucks have just found out what rubbing compound is... heh, heh...

"and after you finish washing it, dry it... use this."

hands over rubbing compound.

"its like wax only you have to rub it in a little harder and when you are done with that, buff it off like wax, then wash it again. thoroughly. then wax it and yer done!"

its one of these.

super busy!!!

happy monday all! i've got two helpers in the yard this morning who are proving themselves worthless in the truck cleaning business. okay yer eighteen and never properly waxed a vehicle before, i'll buy that. but i know you are not a complete idiot and "wax on, wax off" is the real deal... yah yah, you dont whack on or whack off... sure... me either...
get to work, it puts the wax on, waits.... then it takes the wax off... buff, rub, dont touch your nub... ten bucks an hour. thats what i started at when i first came here. and i turned a wrench, not pressure washed a truck. jeeze... times have changed. i used to walk twelve miles to school in the snow....

*eyes glass over and speech trails off*

Saturday, February 16, 2008

so.... im all confused....

help me with some math...
if zack were to pay one thousand five hundred dollars a month on parcel of land, how many months would it take to pay a quarter of a million dollars off?
i live in a one point two million dollar house now. with ten acres of land, and i just had the mostfuckingrandom phone call from my neighbor when i got home today from fixing cheeses car, saying she is putting her property on the market soon and would like to offer it to me first.
she would have to carry the loan...
how much is property tax in california?
i cant hardly pay a phone bill on time, would she want on time payments?
my landlord never gets his money on time.
is two hundred and fifty thousand dollars a lot of money?
i think that works out to thirteen years or so.
whats a good intrest rate?
five percent?
oh, i was in the grocery store on friday and worked out a deal with my old ex park ranger friend.... i'm getting a free dirt bike!
ten percent?
now how does intrest work?
is it ten percent of the value?
ten percent of the time it takes to pay off the loan?
why is my other neighbor think that he is in on the deal?
it has water.
and mad views.
i'm missing out on a blow job/sex/snuggling fot this post.
im not very sleepy.
i just opened another beer.
got some of it on the keyboard.
im so confused.
here in big sur, thats not a lot of money.
i made over sixty five thousand dollars last year.
thats what the i.r.s. thinks.
thats not a lot of money either.
i'm going to have another marlboro.
doesnt that sound good?
my head is pounding.
my dogs snore as load as i do.
cheeses girls talk in their sleep.
do i really want to buy property?
i could never leave then.
what if i die? then what?
i dont have any money.
i dont even have a cell phone in my name.
thats another problem in my life.
if cheese and i were to buy a piece of property together, she would have to get divo--- first.
did i say that?
hey cheese, do you mind if i say that.
ooooh, cheese got bent that i joked about her not having dinner on the plate the other night.
it was a comment reply.
i wasnt being an asshole.
first time ever.
it was a joke.
it was a poem as well.
i wasnt home when she got bent and she forgot all about it.
i had to remind her that she was bent.
i am an also an idiot.
what to think about this new devolopement???
alls i wanted was an H2.
well, i guess i might be able to get a hummer if i go upstairs.
yeah, i'll start there.
wish me luck!
good night.

Friday, February 15, 2008

shit that is pissing me off today

in a perfect world

i'm so pissed about this shit. oh boo hoo, lets feel bad for this guy, he stopped taking his meds, he was a nice boy, smart and attentive... i wanna fucking strangle these people who feel bad for this mother fucker! ARRGGH!!!
when are students going to be able to protect themselves on campus. when are the responsible gun owners in this country going to be allowed to truly feel safe when and where they want to? i think that the school did everything in their power to keep these students safe and watched over. everything they did was by the book.

what if another student in the class happened to have a firearm on his/her person? what if they stood up and gunned the gunman down before he shot all twenty some odd people. perhaps after only shooting ten? would that student be hailed as a hero or slandered for some kind of vigilante.what if there were several armed students in the class room that took him down before he even fired a shot? expelled from school for having weapons on campus? would it have just brought down a different kind of fire fight? perhaps only students that were firing back would have been targets, perhaps the fucking moron might have thought twice about shooting into a crowd of potentially armed people as opposed to shooting at a bunch of helpless bodies.

yeah yeah, how do we regulate that. what would really happen if students walked around armed on campus.

we have air marshals now on every plane that flies in america. sometimes more than one. should we not have classroom marshals in every other class room. perhaps the regents on these school grounds could take a pay cut and pension adjustment to compensate for these new expenditures? have you seen most of the security personal in our college systems these days?
i remember my college days and i could have out run the lot of them on crutches and not even spill my beer.

why have guns in your home? when, if the intruder is proven to be pointed in the leaving your home direction you could be liable for murder!?!?!? or in california if some asshole toting your dvd player out your newly broken window cuts himself, he can successfully sue?

WTF?and students cant carry firearms on campus? or in their dorm rooms or in their cars... i'd tell you where and how many guns i carry, but I'm sure I'm not allowed to do that. you might think me paranoid, but if you cant be safe in a classroom, where the fuck is a safe place to be/live/eat/learn/shop/have sex/play in the park...

this fucker is dammed lucky he took his own life, if there is anybody else like me in the world and perhaps in that classroom, he would have suffered a longer lasting more painful death....


i dont know if i already pimped this guy out yet. fun-knee shit. here is a great post about where he lives and all the "crack" on the side walk. my more adventurous reading will die laughing and my more down home readers might gag and spit and cuss at me.... have fun.
edit: i guess i have posted this link before. so if you dont like it, dont look. if you have never seen it on the other hand...


a whole new meaning of nude photography

thank you nations for the link this morning. at first i wasnt sure what you were talking about. then i figured you must have recieved this as a book. after going through all the photos i'm truely envious. what a nice gift. looks like a great and emotional challenge for the "models" pohotographed. awesome!!! and i agree with you. romance is alive and well.

anyway to give proper credit and link-a-tude go here.

happy friday fuckers!!!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

last fucking one.


is it over yet?

you just cant pay for love these days

just so yall don't think I'm a total schmuck and bah-humbugger on every fucking holiday this world tries to make its inhabitants follow... I've written a small thing for the cheese in my life. ahem...

cheese oh please oh please oh please
wear the socks that go above the knees
i spent the day learning bout birds and bees
so I'm ready to put your mind at ease

the best five minutes you'll ever get
maybe six but i wouldn't bet
just enough to get you wet
i'll be sure to finish don't you fret

see you at home with my pants down low
definetly five if we go real slow
turn on the cam for the late night show
i am all about the love don't you know

so i'll be home soon i hope you can wait
or you have just enough time to masturbate
i hope you will be my long lasting mate
and dinner will hopefully be on the plate

happy thursday and all that shit
i expect when i get home i'll get hit
what else could you want a poem with wit
see what I've done a hole I've dug a deep dark pit

oh is that today?

so its that time of year again when people start complaining if they are single and people start acting like retards if they are not. whats with that. ive already read a bunch of posts today to the subject so i wont belabor here... but get a grip people....
its thursday. hopefully yer partners have taken well enough care of you THROUGH OUT the year that you dont have to waste money on flowers that die and chocolates that taste like shit. crap you wouldnt normaly eat, only today you might cause it came in a box shaped like....
any way i thought i'd post this picture for those of you who might not be getting their (insert funny line about picture above here).
enjoy your thursday!

what day is it?

a few posts ago i had mention that i'd been working out, well that wasnt really true. what i meant to say was that i took up surfing. cheese was a great help in motivating me out into the water... shes been showing me some new moves and i think im getting the hang of things. i just love the warm california waters this time of year and it makes things on a surf board seem so much easier when she is there coaching me...

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

so i found it!

i broke into his house and this is where he works. nice office eh?

i'll give him a proper link cause i have never done it before. on my album cover a post below this one, i found in the right hand cormer some letters. dont know what they mean, but when i typed them into the googley searching thingamabob i got here! i guess this guy takes photos and shit for nine inch nails. he has a cool web site and hope he is not pissed that i stole his pic from filickr and turned into my album cover for my new band ladyville. (which if you have ever been to big sur you know its not.) so here you go rob sheridan, i pimped your web page on my blog. fucker, now give me some money. i'm sure you will be having mad traffic now. hahahahahahahhahaaa.....

oh, and he is a blogger. which he does here.

update: so i checked out his blog and he has some really fucking cool shit on there. worth looking at. but dont like it too much, actually don't look at, it's pretty lame. weak. dont go there, i warned you.

just when you think you cant drink anymore

i found first nations secret porn site.

yeah, ive been feeling it. small aches in the morning, three cups of coffee to get going, two cokes at lunch, red bull at about three and just barely hanging in there at the end of the day... "damn, im not going to drink today..." how many times have i said that? but then at the end of the road from my work is the bar. and even though today i dont feel like drinking, i have to go in there and see a friend. which means free beer. and peanuts. and more free beer. but at this point in the day id rather just go home for some ahem-ing, watch a movie and pass the fuck out.

thats all i wanted to do yesterday as well. but it was drinking buddys birthday and we started by sucking down an eighteen pack at his house, going to the bar and pounding some stellas there, went up to nepenthe for a cheese plate and gentelman jack and coke. after a couple of those we had a jeager shot and a pacifico for the roa... to take out side on the veranda.

got home and having a couple beers before bed sounded like a smart idea. sure hey, whats in that? lets smoke some of that too! brilliant. i was only going to "have a few beers" last night. i guess i forgot to tell myself that.

so today is moving along at its normal mid-week snails pace. the axle on the mule isnt putting itself in like i'd hoped. but what can you do eh?

all right its lunch now, so i better take a break.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

damn you cher


cher has this little thing on her page right now that seemed sort of fun... try it. here are the results for me...

this is my album cover, my band name, and the name of the album...

unfortunatly i tried to go back to the where the picture came from to give its creator props and a link but it just goes fucking random on you... so again, its not one of my photos...


do you ever go back and read posts you have written years ago? well, i picked one at random. this one. its funny to me how much my writing style is the same/changed. i remember that night and i was drinking wine from a bottle, the whole bottle. i used to fight off depression and suicidal thoughts often. its all different now. wierd...

well thats it.


is that guy in the background taking a picture of the person who took this picture?

yeah, i have posted that title before.

last night was our neighbors birthday. we showed up late and ate some killer burritos. i made the mistake of showing their two year old how to chuck his toy across the room. i only did it once and was trying to figure out what the hell it was and "flip" across the room it went. this kid was keen and "flip, flip, flip, flip..." across the room it went. into the back of his sisters head, into the t.v., into everything... whoops....
anyway, i'm beat.
there is this kawasaki mule thing that I'm working on, its kicking my ass. replace the two piece sliding rear axle. simple job right? ah no. I've called my tech type guy over at white knuckle in utah, he told me if I'm having lots of trouble and cursing up a storm, i'm doing it right.
then i called kawasaki and got a service tech on the phone. he told me it just slides right in. that in fact he was looking at a break down of it at that moment. i was looking at the same parts break down as he, in fact it does look like it just slides right in. then i asked him if he had ever done one of those before...
"no, I'm just a service tech."
"so, what is it that you do there."
" i assist people with technical questions, like yours."
"well, it doesn't just slide together and in, any other suggestions?"
"that's the way it is supposed to go together."
"no shit?"
"excuse me?"
"is there anybody there that has actually worked on any of these machines?"
"i don't think so. this is just a service help line."
"oh... thank you, then your service was excellently useless."
"thank you, would you like to take a short five minute survey on..."
fuck you....
not much else is happening, cheese and i hammered out our issues about her car and will be spending yet another saturday working with her dad underneath her wonderful subaru. (did anyone feel the sarcasm. no?)
well i must now crawl into the teeny tiny space in the mules rear end and see if i can shove my axle into it. perhaps i should use more grease.
moral of the story? when shoving your axle into the rear end of a mule, don't call anyone for support, you probably know more about it then they do...

Monday, February 11, 2008


YEAH, FUCKED. but there always is the fact that at least im better than someone... perhaps i'll be back. build my ego back up a little bit. perhaps i'll call these engine people up do some more yelling. or i'll call my parts guy who screwed up $800 in parts for cheeses car and wasted my saturday. or may be i'll sneak a beer at lunch and let it all blow off...

Friday, February 08, 2008

well at some point today it might feel like friday

do you think they are french?

i open my e-mail box this morning and hntr had sent me some of these motivational posters... ahh, doesn't this bring back the days of old... no? oh.. too bad for you then. but i bet you are lying anyway. your significant other is reading over your shoulder saying "how crass! what is this shit? why do you read this?" no, am i still wrong? my bad.. wink wink.
cheese and i occasionally read the blogs together. i try and get her to read things out loud, why i dunno. perhaps i wasn't read enough books to as a child, perhaps i cant really read and am tired of looking at everyone's pictures and funny looking scribbles underneath them, or may be its because she sounds like one of those voices on "books on tape". you know the ones that make everything sound interesting and fun. whatever it is, beware people are reading your blogs out loud to each other...
its friday, we had a huge problem in the yard already this morning and I'm having to make a zillion phone calls to not only get something warrantied, but to get them to drive down from ball sac-ramento to fix it. try that one out. ever try and get something fixed on a warranty? okay, now add on the "fix it now you mother fucker!" conversation part i use and see where that goes...
actually it is going quite smooth. remember way back, when i was complaining about this engine i was having built? well now its unloading diesel into the oil pan. lame, disastrous if you will. so i started with the company executive, at the branch that fucked us in the first place. then moved on to the lying sack of shit who fucked us next. then i called the branch that finished building the engine and talked to the mechanic that did it, the engine foreman who scheduled it, the guy i paid $19, 960.09 to give it back to me, and finally talked to the branch manager.
i received a phone call within minutes of getting off the phone from sac-o-shit guy. he doesn't have any body to come down till may be next week, but not likely to happen untill the following week. i gave him the "you need to fix it now mother fucker speech" and called his district manager to discuss that conversation with him. moments later i receive a call from the people who finished building our engine and they have some one who can come down on tuesday.
"thanks, that's better, but..."
i got off the phone with him and called the branch manager at his location again and discussed with him his options, i had a phone number of the B.B.B. in hand and came up with a fictional contact that i had there.
"since your branch is the only one operating in northern california that doesn't have its service staff still on strike i would hate to tarnish what have worked so hard to achieve. the company you represent fucked us. you know it, i know it and now you have to do everything you can do in your power to help us. i will not go away. i am not afraid of driving up there and sitting in your office. i would rather do this over the phone. "
"yes sir, hold on..."
*his hold music is an ad for their company*
"zack, i will have a truck there this weekend or monday? i have a few questions..."
we talked about what the engine is doing, what i think it might be and some options of repair. my warrantee extension on the new work and i even threw in the idea of a free rental of a concrete truck while we wait. (i'm a fucking bastard.) meanwhile i had his other branches leaving messages for me to "call back immediately" and "please only deal with our location" and "we are doing the best we can" etc. etc...
as i am typing this i am getting another call. we will see and i'll try to update you as the day progresses. (like anybody reads this shit, this far into the post. you all are just here for the smutty pictures huh?)

well i hope you all have a fucking awesome weekend and "throw your potato salad in the air!!!"

Thursday, February 07, 2008

is it friday yet?

finished the menzi muck up today, only to have the relitazation that i should do a bit more... so i ordered the parts, i mean, my parts guy in germany said he would call/e-mail me back and let me know exactly how long i will have to wait for them.

do you like to waste time at work?

what else???? sure feels like friday to me... my dirt bike dreams are falling further and further away... after beaus hospital stay, the eight hundred dollar propane bill, the parts for my truck and swaping of the cell phone bill into my name... im going to be left with grocery money for this month...
yeah, yeah, quit drinking and smoking and the bike is yours right... well lets see if thats true. between our combined smoking habit, thats about six bucks a day. (at our local store, smokes are $6.66 a pack after locals discount.) so that times thirty is how much? and daily beer consumption, humrph, thats a conservative $13 a day. taking into consideration i drink at the bar occasionaly and have nothing to drink on fewer occasions. so how much is that now all together?

*final jeopardy music in back ground*

well as far as my math says its about five hundred and seventy bucks!!
WTF? holy shit! makes you think doesnt it? thats amazing! im able to process hundreds of gallons of booze and several pounds of tar and nicotine a year! wow! now thats something to think about.
oh, uh... i mean, makes you think about how much money i would have "extra" at the end of each month if i didn't waste my money on toxins... maybe i'll spend more time getting the still running again... and my neighbor will be growing tobacco this year. perhaps i'll ask for some of those seeds...
am i still missing the point here? perhaps i'd be more healthy and fit? miss less work due to sick days and be more alert and prepared for the day if i wasnt hung-over all the time? i'd have more energy for all the activities i don't motivate to do now.
anyway i'm getting blasted with calls... i'll be back.


what that means is we have been using the wrong oil. we should have been using a synthetic sae50 oil instead... and do you all know what that means?!?!? more fucking work for me. have a nice day!

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

this week has been tough to get a post out.... ive have some of the higher ups out in the yard helping me with a major project. we are replacing all the hydraulic ram packing on an older one of these. fairly painful project. new back flow valves, hoses, nipples, fittings, bolts, nuts and the like... time consuming and everything has to be done right the first time... had to custum weld some of the rams up with "bumpers" because the wear pins are getting sloppy as well.
what does all this mean. well, the "higher upper helpers" are getting a taste of what i do all day when im not fucking off on the company dime... like this.(which i stole from shife, or beast or someone elses site.) but its been real nice to have some decent thinkers out in the yard, under a piece of equipment with me...
yeah all that story just to say why there hasnt been shit for profundity here lately... lookie there, i used the words shit and profundity in the same sentence. my english teachers would be proud...
other than that not much else is new. cheese and i went on a plant liberation mission the other day! how fun is that? sneaking up on to abandoned private property with beautiful flowers and digging them up for our own house!!! a third of the back of my truck was full.
we have a gray water system at our house that never really watered anything, so cheese started a large flower bed to help with all the water. we grabbed a bunch of cali-lillys, (how the fuck do you spell that?) they seem like they will soak up a bunch of that water, narsisis and some other bulbing varieties i cant spell or remember the names of.
i love that shit. i used to be quite the thief in my younger days, so when i get a chance to do a little liberating its a memorable rush. we have so many properties here in the sur that are owned by people who never stay there. their gardens are overgrown and mistreated. if they survive at all. so a "thinning" of their uncared for plants doesnt seem like a harmful thing?!? no/yes?
anyway, that was my lunch break and instead of eating i had a red bull.
and spell check still doesnt seem to be working for me...

Tuesday, February 05, 2008



Monday, February 04, 2008


this is the entrance to our road, which leads to another road, which then leads to a final right hand turn to our house.... i stole this picture from this guy....

so everyone here is "sick" and the people who did show up are dropping like flies.... hahahahaaa. our front office manager called in and now im sitting at the desk. answering the phone and taking messages... hahahahaaa, trying and get through to someone here? i dont think so. im just taking massages. if your lucky im givng them to the people they belong to. if not, they go in the circular file...

not much of a post but i was enjoying the stolen photo thing. hope yer all having a good day.

i had this thought this weekend but i seem to have forgotten it.

highly trained professional at work!!

what the fuck is going on with blogger!?!? is anyone elses spell check not working or is it just me??

yeah, i think at some point this weekend i lost a thought. im sure it was a good one, simply because i thought it. if i thunk it, it must be good, im a good thunker.
just trying to remember what the hell it was is hurting my head. fuck the patriots. when ever things seem to be going good wham. fuck the patriots. what the hell was i thinking was so damn cool i wanted to post about it??? anybody have any ideas?
i could tell you all that a friend of mine went to get a price quote on some repair work done to her car. i told her "dont pay more then forty dollars for that work". (she needed to have two studs replaced on her front hub, you know the bolts that hold the tire on?!?) she calls me a couple hours later and says "they want to charge me two hundred dollars. thats after the discount." wtf? so i did the repair while people watched. took less time to remove and replace the studs than it took buddy to put the spare tire back in its underthebedofthetruck storage place...
i could tell you about all that, but that would be boring and probubly piss me off talking about it!
i could tell you about the birthday party for mini cheese we had at river inn this sunday. how it turned out to be a fun party for all! even though the weather was crazy and we had to stay inside. we were loud and had kids running all around wearing funny glasses and neon glowing necklaces and party hats and plastic floweres, blowing various types of noise makers, swinging around slinkys and popping baloons... we apologized to our waitress, (a friend of ours) for the noise and asked if we had tipped her well enough. we were basically her only table and left more than eighty bucks in tip. on a seventy dollar tab i think thats pretty good. we brought our own cake and everyone really enjoyed it, picked up all our own garbage and stayed later for a couple of adult beers...
i could tell you about all that, but no... that would bore you all as well.
i could tell you that the coffee here this morning tastes like it was brewed down the crack of someone ass, but no... that might be in poor taste... get it "poor taste"?

or the fact that more than half of our employees are out sick this morning... hmmm... i saw most of their cars at the bar last night on our way home... sick... at least call in hung over... pussies. i could tell you about all that but who cares right?

what the fuck was i wanting to post about today? fuck! it was great! inspiring and funny.... fuck it... its monday and i feel good, just thought id rub that one in a little bit as well .