Thursday, June 30, 2011


as some of you know i like some pretty weird shit... photos of all types, womens high heeled shoes, blowing shit up and doing voice overs while people watching from afar, naked motorcycle riding, blowing bubbles, backpacking into the deep wilderness and making a feast of a meal, paying to get into an event and then volunteering my time while i am there... eating lunch out every day of the week, etc... so i natually assume that other people do some of the same things... i mean i know there are some true WEIRDOS out there, more than half of the internet is full of it, so i dont feel too bad. but, when someone looks down their nose at me for my interests i can't help feeling that they are the odd ones. really what the fuck is wrong with people?

just last week i bought a bit of a hand cannon, a smith and wesson .44 magnum. it's stainless steel with an 8 3/8 inch long barrel. think dirty harrys gun, but a smidge bigger. why would i want something like this you may ask? why not? i didn't have one moments before that and now i do. what the fuck would i do with such a thing? i dunno, shoot it, put soda cans in the sun for a few hours until they are ready to explode and blow them up... put a scope on it and see how far/accurate it shoots? put it in my gun case and forget about it. it's not my biggest gun by any means, but it's up there...

there are people who just aren't into guns, and that's just weird. see that? i think they are weird for not enjoying one of Americas favorite pastimes... i was at my buddies house this week after i just bought it and was showing it to him (he is another enthusiast). his family was there and he got his wife to hold it and point it up in the air like a charlies angel... it was indeed a hot thing to see. I'm sure that did something for their marriage that night... heh heh... but one of their visiting family members was totally put out by it. by it's mere presence in the house, the fact that we were at the dining room table talking about guns and shooting made him almost, angry... it was a weird response.. granted this guy trains at the MMA gym in his home town, (that's mixed martial arts, and he is a big fucking dude.) but really? your put out by a firearm? that's just un American to me.

so whats weird? the guy who likes raunchy porn and then sleeps with his wife with tender loving care? the girl who likes sun bathing in the nude but covers up all her "assets" when in public? the couple (gay or straight) who make out in public? the guy who like guns and shooting but has never been hunting in his life? (unless you count the hundred blue jays he has shot outside his bedroom window at five thirty in the morning when he is trying to sleep in on his only day off.) the woman who likes to tie men up and stomp on their balls? religious folks? MJ from my blog roll, is she weird? the amish? the feeling of mud between your toes? huh...

so what is weird? something against the societal norm? isn't that how we came to be in this country in the first place? something that is taboo? isn't that the same thing? i simply don't have the answer, don't need one... i'm perfectly happy being weird... how bout you?

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

welcome back!

so after a killer weekend meeting new/old people, drinking a lot, spending over twenty four hours in Disneyland, driving a cumulative total of thirteen hours and eating enough junk food to kill a vegatarian i finally made it home. the new house sitters did an amazing job and just like he said "the house would be cleaner than when i left it"... awesome. the dogs must have got some serious attention cause they barely stirred from their beds when we walked in the door. sweet.
i show up to work today and all the stress and bullshit i left behind smacked me in the face with a flat nosed shovel. one of the projects i fixed almost caught on fire. (i rehabed a fourteen year old electric jackhammer, this was something that was on its way out and i thought i could squeeze a few more days of operation out of it before we spent the 1600 hundred bucks on a new one.) alas, the boys got it to a job and the windings melted. damn.
i was really hoping for a success at the end of last week. i needed it. i had gotten into it with the boss before i left and was feeling quite defeated already. so when i came back to the jack hammer i fixed and it didn't last very long it wasn't a good way to start the day.
what i seem to be forgetting lately is im too invested in this company, i care too much and at times i feel like the only one. i watch bad decision after bad decision being made and have no voice to do anything about it. ive pushed my way into management meetings and have tried to share with people here that some of the things they are doing are an absolute waste of time and money, but it falls on deaf ears. then i bring it all home with me. grind my teeth at night and drink too much to forget about it. fuck it. i need to stop doing that shit.
so i think starting from now, I'm going to separate myself from it all. i won't give a shit, once again. my attitude will change, people will notice, my work ethics will suffer and i'll be reprimanded AGAIN.
after being with this company for the last thirteen years i can identify the cycles pretty well. what i really need to be doing is taking this week off. i have so much shit to do at home and with my other projects that coming to this job should be taking the back burner. i just cant seem to tear myself away from it. what i need to do is to tell this company to blow it out their collective asses and trust me on a few things...
but no, that's not going to happen either.

Thursday, June 02, 2011

whats really going on here.

just like this photo here... don't get me wrong, i love it. really i do, its a hot photo. a young woman, dressed as a nun, pulling up her outfit to inspect some sort of garter belt malfunction? who knows. but what is really going here? a plane landing in the background? is this some sort of plot to rob the drug traffickers of there loot? or just fucking around at the airport with a camera? or is it someones buddy in the plane and they are trying to get a rise out of them? this womans boyfriend? who knows! perhaps she is aerosexual?
but it seems i spend a lot of time thinking about what the real deal is around here. what are people motivations for doing the things they do. why would they say that? what is that going to do for them. and then why would i react the way i did? what do i have to gain from that? anyways... Ive got to get to work and finish up my day. Ive got a busy weekend ahead of me. enjoy your selves people! lift up your skirts and pull up your tops! someone may be watching...