Friday, November 16, 2007

MORE ON RICH FUCKERS

so after a week of sitting around with sick people everywhere, not doing chores or cleaning up after ourselves much, i get a phone call when i get home from work.
"there will realtor's at our house in the morning." yeah i bitch about it all the time, but it really was the last thing i wanted to do when i got home last night... clean up the house. douche it. so we did and now it looks like this...


not bad, cheese cleans like a mad woman. on, under, next to, below, she gets it all, throw down the usual "sweep, mop, counter top, vvrroom, vvrroom, vacuum and we were done. watched a movie, took a late night shower, got into bed, ahem, ahem, and passed out. cheese studied into the wee hours of the morning... so today there are people wandering through my house, looking in my closets and peeking into my pantry. opening all my kitchen drawers and cabinets and judging me. yeah, you know they are... so i try and leave them a few misleading articles for them to say "WTF?" to themselves... you can't see in the picture but we have a coat rack by the front door. i have an LAPD hat that i stole from some kwik-mart in Santa Barbara years ago. i hung that hat on top of a holstered .45 with extra clips. (the kind that tucks ever so neatly under your armpits when worn. in the shop i have an air soft machine gun.(i bought it to scare off the neighbor dogs.) and i leave that out in plain site. hahahahhaaaa (i hide the orange tip on it of course.) but i can imagine what people might think after driving twenty minutes up a private road, then two more miles strait up a dirt road, only to end up at some ex-cops glory days ranch house.... hahahahhaaaa.. welcome to hicksville USA rich fuckers...what does one think when they drive to the middle of bumsmack, California? is this your shangrala? 1.2 million dollars of what? any ideas? what would you think if you rolled up to this house and saw it was loaded with guns and dogs and a whiskey still?


UPDATED PIC:thought i should put put one of the bedroom up as well... you know "to inspire the men..." hahahha no, not really. figured i'd put it up anyway.



8 comments:

Old Knudsen said...

I would say, "cool an unattended weapon and proceed to play gunslinger."

INNER VOICES said...

i am hoping that said "rich person" wasnt walking around with any spare .45 bullets in his/her pockets... other than that perhaps i should have errantly left one in the chamber... oops, one less rich person.

Iksodas said...

and.. any of my "art" hanging aroudn the place I am sure adds to the overall impression

INNER VOICES said...

shit, i need post a picture of one of your prints on the wall... dammit! i'll get it done this weekend... thank you iksodas for the comment! there is a picture of our bedroom, (still in the finishing stages. i dont want to buy crap, so the bed sits on the floor and i dont have proper, nightstands as of yet...)which has several framed nude works on it... i'll see if i can find it!

Kay said...

Dude, I fucking love your house. When can I move in?

Anonymous said...

ya, that place looks WAAAAAYYYY better than it did last night. you slob.

Black Egg said...

Oh god, I would have had a blast with that (no pun intended) - I think I would've poured a can of beets or cranberry sauce in the toilet and then just leave it... or some whole bratwurst or something... haha, sorry, I cracked myself up with that one. Your house looks fucking sweet. I'm jealous of all the space. Have a great weekend!

INNER VOICES said...

kay: you come down and stay with us when ever you want! lots of space and room for growing some hair back!!!

anon: yeah, yeah, yeah...

b,egg: i know!, sometimes i wonder what they actually do. this time they left the toilet up, pissed on the rim too. classy fuckin rich people. looked in our dishwasher as well they did. and thanks for the kudos on our place. i wish i had a picture of the girls room to put up, they have got the set up! back deck, tv, vcr, dvd, game cube all with surround sound! wish i had it that good when i was nine!

sushi: when kay comes down we will have to fly you out! nad thank you too for the nice comment on our humble abode..