Monday, December 01, 2008

PROOF OF LIFE




I've been gone from here for so long I've even lost a follower. just when posts were cranking up some serious traffic, i stop commenting back, get really rude, and stop posting.... yep, crazy shit. the exact opposite of what most bloggers do... fuck it. 

holidayz went by, I'm sure I'll talk about that later..

work is driving me to that special place i hate so fucking much, that place where i ended up not working for them for six months. id rather lick an elephants anal seepage than go to wok tomorrow.

in other news...

i am building a 170 square foot deck, seven feet up into some madrone trees on the eastern side of our yard and i managed to fill my right eye and socket with wood shavings. even with glasses on. drilling holes while holding the tool directly over your head and looking straight up is only for people like me. looks like i have a black eye. all swollen and puss-y. itchy, scratchy, fuck just plain bothersome.

i know i need some more time on the computer these days and will eventually get around to everyones comments and blogs, but I've been fairly disagreeable as of late and not had much of anything fucking positive to blog about. 

the fucking twat at work decided to try and tell me what my job description entails and how we all would like "that", but we don't all get that now do we you fucking semen incubator?!?!

so no more excuses, i do miss all of you and long to be blogging again real soon... otherwise I'll be back tomorrow and have some serious work related shit to spout off on...

35 comments:

kylie said...

first !!

kylie said...

i would like some of "that" but "that" seems thin on the ground

INNER VOICES said...

what crackin kylie! yeah we all want some of that...

Megan said...

Dammit! I was so SURE I was gonna be first this time. But giving way to Kylie is okay.

Just wanted to say, I had no idea that incubation started at the semen level...

Suzanne said...

HI HONEY!!! WELCOME BACK!!! God we missed you. Wow, I'm third and damn proud. Love the photo because you look like a very grumpy man (VGM), but still handsome under the scowl. Is that how you spell scowl? God, am I going to have to look that up. Yup. Looked it up, it's correct my dear man!

The eye stuff worries me. You can buy goggles you know. They're cheap at the box stores and protect your eyes from overhead wood shavings. Jeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzz. Honey, I can't think for both of us. Please be careful with your eyes because they're the only ones you have. Hope you feel better soon. May I suggest you go to the drug store and buy saline solution to wash your eyes out. Cheese will know what I'm talking about. It's a cheap, easy solution to a nasty problem. Don't suffer. Do the right thing. (That'll be $100 ~ Dr. Suze.)

Work. I don't know what to say because I know you're suffering. The economy sucks, so I suggest you tough it out. I'll tell you something funny, we all know you, so I feel sorry for the poor woman who's doing you wrong. Seriously. I'm laughing because that's one brave MF!!!

Love you darling. Hope things improve. We're all here, but you akreadt know that.

XO

P.S. Thanks for the photo!

Suzanne said...

How the hell did already become akreadt? That's just pathetic.

Leah said...

Hey dude--we all miss you too--but no worries--

Dr Zibbs said...

I think you should get back in the swing by commenting on my blog.

Queen Goob said...

NINTH!!!!

Sorry you've been blinded by life but hey, looks like a lot of us were gone and/or incapacitated for the holiday for one reason or another.

Get well and if you need a matched pair I'll be glad to blacken the other one.....hey, I love ya, man.

That Guy said...

Word.

I got pepper tree shavings in my eye-knuckle once doing the same thing. Scratched my eye and had to wear a patch (aaarrrrr).

Good luck at work man. Fuck those milky lickers anyway.

MJ said...

Someone needs to go to his happy place.

Megan said...

Be sure to let us know when that deck is built so we can come over and christen it!

kylie said...

yeah! i'd gladly christen anything right about now

Queen Goob said...

Spooge burns, too.

Queen Goob said...

Leaving early - got a concert tonight so hopefully I'll be up and aware tomorrow.

Hope your feeling better!

Leni Qinan said...

(*Opens eyes wide as saucers and wows*)

WOW! Hello! Thanks for the pic!

You're still feeling bad about commenting back/posting. Pls. Don't. As I said before, it's nicer when you're around, but you got something unusual and beautiful: your commenters interact and talk to each other and that's fun -isn't it, people?-

Your eye: Seriously, why don't you visit the ophtalmologist? These tiny wood shavings may have caused small injures in the cornea (you could have keratitis or a minor, but very annoying problem that may need some medical treatment). Or you want to wear a patch too???

Work. Try to ignore the twat. I know it's hard, but you can do it. Good luck there, Z.

Take care.

INNER VOICES said...

megan, oh yeah the fucking baby machine is going to be pumping out another unit in six months or so... some people should be required to pass a test before procreation.

suz, we have gallons of strele eye solution here at work and have some one time users in my glove box. thanks for the comment and i dont think the silly bint who i share an office with three days a week knows what i have in store for her... heh heh.

leah, *high fives leah*

zibbs, i'll be swinging on by shortly...

goob, "hit me with your best shot.... fire away...."

that guy, i could go for an eye patch. might help me tone down my "angry mexican" look i have going these days... put me into that target "booty pirate" image ive been hoping to attain.

mj, *dreams of striped stockings and lipstick*

megan, we will be devilizing it, no christenings... jesus stopped coming to my property years ago... but all would be welcome! i'll take pictures when its closer to being finished!

kylie, you would be the one to do it!

goob, i dont think that sounds quite as manly... "dude i got cum in my eye and its been burning for days".... might work for some though... thanks for the well wishes.

INNER VOICES said...

LENI!! YOU SNUCK RIGHT IN THERE!!! thanks as well for the heartfelt comment and possible eye irritation names. unfortunately ive maxed out the american insurance i have and a little red swollen eye that bleeds when i fuck with it is no big deal. i have to have more than one thing to complain about! hahahahaa....


funny story. cheese has just got us hooked on the DSL internet at our house and that was the first pic i tried to upload on to the web since we got it... its hard to look at the camera on the mactop with out it taking pictures up your nose... wow eh? thanks! alls i see are my deep creases in my forehead, my hot pink eye and my moms clock that works when it wants to...

thanks again everyone for the bitchin comments!!!

Suzanne said...

Your handsome, your fine and when you get that eye fixed, you'll be perfect. What I was looking at is the plant. Someone's taking really good care of that thing!!! It's lovely.

XO

P.S. What ever's in your eye you need to get out. It scratches your cornea. Horrible, horrible situation. And you'll need medication. You realize that, don't you? IV, you kill me. I know you can't stand me most of the time, but I love you despite your lack of gratitude!!! What? Lunges at IV with all the gusto of a woman on a mission. Big hug. Big kiss. Oh shut up and enjoy it. Look, even Cheese is laughing.

LYDIA said...

Well then, I am guessing this is the perfect post for new readers to read? I am very sorry about your eye, I hope it looks a little less swollen and puss-y soon.

INNER VOICES said...

HAHAHAHA!!! never a bad time to start reading the voices. welcome and feel free to kick back and enjoy. this week i will most assuredly be bashing people from my work and bitching and moaning about money and fucking bills and shit. stuff most people can relate to... again, welcome to the voices!!!

That Guy said...

He's really a good smelling, soft, fuzzy guy, once you get to...wait...where am I?

INNER VOICES said...

that guy, get out of the front of my shorts fucker!

*zips shorts back up hoping no one noticed*

LYDIA said...

well atleast you smell good, right? Nothing better than a clean, nice smelling man :)

That Guy said...

Um, look at that nappy fuck! There's no WAY that dude smells like anything but bearing grease and Beau.

INNER VOICES said...

motor oil, tobacco and alcohol are usually acquired tastes, especially when mixed together... but some find me irresistible!!

INNER VOICES said...

ahem, now now that guy... lets not scare off the new commenter just yet... ive just been to her blog and left a very nice comment about one of her posts... you should try that sometime there polesmoker.

Megan said...

You tell him, IV!

Megan said...

And where is the new post I was expecting to see when I came over here, hmmmm?

hnter1018 said...

It was here. I read it but now its gone

Daisy said...

*stands in line for the licking an elephants anal seepage instead of going to work tomorrow*

let me know when the licking begins...hell it almost sounds good compared to the fucking shit i have to deal with in the morning...fucking shit!

INNER VOICES said...

megan, hntr is right. i had one up and when i went back to read it, it was well, lacking in the usual voices sarcasm... so i pulled it. great pic though. i reuse the pic as it is sure to please at least leah, if not some of the other readers...

hntr, so quick you were, that post was only up for a minute or two...

daisy, line starts behind me and i hear that tomorrows elephants have been eating a healthy diet of olestra laden peanuts... sure to be a good flavor...

Walker said...

Blogging is like pissing.
You do it when you have to and where you want to

LYDIA said...

haha...don't worry, I don't scare easily.

INNER VOICES said...

WALKER, i might just steal that!!!

lydia, good, glad to hear it, at times one needs some thick skin here.