Monday, March 17, 2008

pain... and the weekend.

scene outside brians cafe/pub

this weekend was mostly fucked. Friday was one of uber-mini-cheeses first sleep overs. and we were SURE this one wasn't sick. on the way home Friday night with the girls the sleepover girl vomited all over cheeses Subaru. not just in one place but on the seat, herself, the door, the floor, etc. so when i called to see how things were going after work, cheese was not impressed with having to clean up her car. chalked it up to car sickeness, we do live up "one of the scariest roads in the Sur".
needless to say i lingered an extra hour at a buddies house. when i got home things seemed normal and dinner went down no problem.

the sleepover girl seemed shy and quiet. i guess that's part of her M.O. well as i wake up at the ass crack of god know when, cheese is running around with the lights on and washing machine going and shes is not in a good mood.

"hey, whats with the fucking lights?"

her response was not something i wanted to hear. first i thought maybe i pissed her off somehow, soon to find out that sleepover girl had vomited all over the bed, herself, the pillows, comforter, etc...

i got out of bed and did what i could do to help out. stoked the fire and turned on a movie to stay up with cheese as she prepped the child for the drive down the mountain to meet the parents.

WTF? this kid was SICK. not anxious or nervous, but fucking sick. ahem, why do you give us your sick children?!?!

woke up late in the morning to discover that it was snowing outside?!?! not just snowing but snow globe snowing! thick blankets of snow on the ground and in the air?!?! we had snowball fights and built mini snow men and stood around in complete guffaw. had some friends show up and spent the day playing board games and drinking beer.

i made some killer chicken schnitzel and cheese busted some killer veggies and a spinich salad. we all chowed down. friends left and we passed the fuck out. i guess i was snoring REALLY loud that night and apparently i was moody about being whacked in the face several times, because i woke up late and alone with a sore nose.

Sunday was mellow and spent the morning in the sun with some friends, laying around on the gravel in front of my house! not twenty four hours before we had a snow ball fight in the same exact spot! built cheese another raised garden bed up on the hill next to the house. with room for another one. these are sixteen feet long and twenty inches wide, just over a foot deep. we are going to put our tomatoes and possibly some corn those boxes... our neighbor came down with her kids and a small amount of mayhem ensued.

once we got everyone to bed and into it ourselves we were fucking spent. super-spent. 0 tolerance, spent.

somewhere this weekend i managed to pick up this everlasting lower abdominal pain. goes right down into my left testicle, no its not a hernia. cheese looked it up and came up with diverticulitis. sounds right, but I'm not over sixty and i shit just fine. i dunno. everyone here at work sees me walking around like an old man and is trying to get me to go to the doctor. this morning the pain level has increased to a steady four or five with the shooting pains into the sixes...

if it continues to get worse today i might go in later. but what are they gonna do. that's the shit i hate about doctors. its all best guess. and with abdominal pains, its real fucking hard to diagnose. what are you gonna do huh? stick your finger in my but for a digital rectum exam only to find out that it hurts even worse? prescribe some pain pills and send me home for rest? i could do that with out taxing my insurance or having fingers in my but. yeah its been getting worse all weekend. if the pain gets into the sevens I'll go. but I've only ever been in that level of pain a few times in my life. and higher levels even fewer times. (breaking bones, concussions, car accidents, etc...)

so we will see. i wouldn't normally bitch about that here except its about the only thing i can think about right now... so happy rookie drinking and driving day everyone and i hope you can use public transportation as much as possible. those pesky officers will be out in force this evening and nothing short of sobriety will be excused. its a money making holiday for law enforcement!!!


MJ said...

Before you head out to the doc's, bend over and we'll all judge your condition for ourselves.

We promise to be gentle.


only if you tickle me first!

denim said...

you try kidney stone? i know that's come up before, but it seems fitting for ya. and you don't shit right, quit lying to yourself. i thought i noticed a bit of a limp from ya. anyway, thanks again for havin us up!


no worries! yeah, i now seem to be getting these sharp spikes of pain shooting up from my testical... wtf? if one of these makes me fall over, im gonna be pissed!! thanks for coming up and think about what we discussed. it would be a fun assed trip if you rolled with us. and if not it would be a fun assed week for you to stay at my house too!!!

oakland heidi said...

I hate sick people. I wish people would get it together and STAY HOME when they are sick. It is so rude.

Hope your belly feels better. My grandma has diverticulitis. Nasty... I've never heard of someone young having it though... kidney stones and gal stones I have heard of our age group having... I hope you get better soon and that no one gets the barf cootie.


cheese was on that sickness area quick! we had mini-cheese in our bed quick and everything that she had touched was douched! thanks for the kudos!!!

FirstNations said...

go to the doctors NOW.

two words: TOM GREEN.


GET TO THE FUCKING DOCTORS. I'm serious. people our age cant afford to dick around with things like that. I had an acquaintance in highschool get taken in THREE MONTHS TIME from that shit. you know which shit i mean.


Leah said...

Oy, that's one horrifying sleep over. I really pity you guys. "Barf cooties" (that's hilarious) are my biggest fear. I am seriously not kidding about that. Even reading your post scared me, like maybe the cooties will come through the ether and get me. I'm that obsessive compulsive.

Don't panic about the pain, there's no point. What does Cheese say? Does she want you to go to the doctor? You should just do whatever she tells you to!!!

Suzanne said...

First, I feel so sorry for the little girl who was sick. It must be awful to be invited to someone's house when you're sick. Did anyone think to ask if she might want to go home after the first fiasco? Poor little girl and poor Cheese.

Second, I agree with Firstnations. Get to the doctor. Recently a dear friend's wife had severe abdominal pain and was diagnosed with a twisted colon. I wouldn't screw around for too long. It's better to be humiliated than dead.


Cecile said...

Just suck your balls in up under your ass and get yourself to the Dr. Stop being so stubborn. I have your address now, I can mail my cast iron skillet to Cheese and she could use it on ya. NOW GO!


nations... thanks and yes, i do belive today is the day... i didnt get much sleep and im into the sixes now... i fucking hate doctors... i like to believe im smarter than everyone else and trusting people is difficult. thanks for the motivation.

leah, thanks for the comment. barf cooties arent something i terribly enjoy as well... and i try do to what im told but i dont seem to be able to listen all the time either...

suz, of course the child was asked and asked nad asked , hows she doing, would she like to go home, talk to her mom, etc. the thing is, you cant leave a childs life up to the child. there needs to be some dirrection for a five year old. ever see the movie big daddy? if there was no direction, we would have a world were children eat ketsup for dinner and never shower or brush their teeth. and yes im going to have to go to the doctor.

cecile, thank you as well for the motovation... and i will be going soon.

cher said...

dude, fuck the dr. for real. right up his bum with your finger when you go